Maturity

As I mature, I've learned the following:

~You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

~No matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.

~It takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

~You can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that you better have a big penis or huge boobs.

~You shouldn't compare yourself to others-they are more screwed up than you think. (They just hide it better!)

~You can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.

~We are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.

~Regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place!

Hope the list made you laugh, or at least smile!